To Anagolay,

The Goddess of Lost Things.

I ask for forgiveness, great goddess, for not hearing your voice for quite so long. How terrible it must be to watch cherished memories, even past lives, reside in your peaceful realm. Yet I thank the goddess for returning some of them to me. Perhaps the time has come for others to remember as well.

And so, I burn these precious Sampaguita candles and offer a bouquet of special flowers in your name–golden plumerias, vibrant blush hibiscus and blooming, branching orchids. May this offering also please you tonight as I pray and relieve myself of what plagues my mind in a world that has been forced to change into something unrecognizable, tainted and sustained by constant bloodshed.

Oh, great keeper of lost things, has your realm changed throughout the years as well?

Your dwelling must have an impressive library, full of scriptures, stories, rituals–ancient words from our ancestors burned to ashes and blown away by harsh winds to which my heart mourns for. Its contents, forever believed to be scattered across foreign continents or buried beneath six feet below. Tools once shaped from wood and stone—the ibat, bangkaw, or budjak—have faded from memory. It must be strange to see it dwindle and be replaced with devices and colorful screens. During sleepless nights, I often wonder whether these forgotten pieces of our past have found their way safely to your care.

I pray that those lost words and items of significance are safely displayed until they are deemed to be returned back to their owners one day. Just as I hope to recover my own peace of mind, the possibility of a better life, and the person who I once loved myself to be. Is she there with you now? Along with the lost soul of my mother? My beloved pet?

Oh, great keeper of lost things, have you noticed how many more spirits are now walking and waiting aimlessly in your realm? Do they not resemble the spirit of a fiery passion that was once revered by the Babaylan?

To my dismay, the majority of our people have forgotten it– to love our blood, to be free of lingering shadows and live in light with the spirit of being a true Filipino. Society, and those who govern it, have corrupted and twisted it into complete nothingness almost as if they have forgotten to be selfless and sincere all together; no longer worthy to be called Datu. They wish for us to be molded like clay with their fraudulent promises then cast us away in burning kilns; forever hollow and stiff to better suit their devious plots even if deep cracks start to show.

For so long, it has remained in your dwelling because of these unwelcomed voyages of holy inquisitors with sharpened bull horns, ravaging eagles chasing knowledge and the raccoons who wore the emblem of the blinding rising sun that seeks to cleanse. They bind and bid every ounce of freedom we have until we have ultimately lost its meaning.

We stood no chance as we watched ourselves fade away and move on; the spirit being an afterthought in exchange for safety and survival. How worried you must be for our people as an eternal witness to how they have continuously abandoned and severed their divine connection to our gods and goddesses all these years.

And yet, despite this grim reality, I pray that you may grant them safe passage to their owners and awoke their dormant hearts– to let it spark the flames of old and let us march to its beat once more. I know fully well that we are deeply flawed, unable to learn how history always seems to repeat itself; but I beg of you to find mercy and give us another chance to redeem ourselves.

And if it pleases the goddess, I shall take on the honor and burden of being the last Umalohokan, to serve as a living proof that it is still possible to live through the mundane modernity of life while weaving the ancient past into the present. I shall remember thee in each fleeting dawn and sunset for as long as I am able to or until I am approached by Huklaban, swept away by Sidapa and even embraced by Luyong Kabig.

I swear to thee, Goddess Anagolay, that this hope shall not wander into your realm. I trust in your perfect timing that it will be revealed and remembered by the masses. Hayaan niyo rin sana na kung sino-man nakakabasa at nakakarinig ng aking panalangin ay mabigyan muli ng pagkakataon na unawain ang halaga nito at maalala ang ating sinaunang buhay.

Sa Muling Pagsilbi at Pagulat,

Ang Huling Umalohokan

The Frontman